I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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