I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
