so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
