question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
