He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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