the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
