Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
