He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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