her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
