4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
