god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
