AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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