Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
