I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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