i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize