he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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