He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
