We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
