marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
