All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize