she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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