After last night, I could never be a politician.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
