I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
