Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
