she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
