Well apparently he's into motor boating.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
