Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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