hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize