We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
