dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
