this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
