it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Drunk is a universal language darling
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
