I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
