Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize