And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
