that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
