if you like me you must not know who I am
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
