Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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