small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
