Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
