Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
When are your genitals available?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
