My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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