Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
