the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
