Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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