I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
