If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
