separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Randomize
