I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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