I feel like I'm in dance class right now
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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